Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Someone came in the potted fern
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
