I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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