Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
