he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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