her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I think i got beer on your cat.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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