My brain says no but my pants say off.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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