i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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