Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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