i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
