IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Randomize
