yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I am naked and annoyed.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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