never play flip cup with pint glasses
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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