I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
