I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
