Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
