dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
You ruined the universe
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
