How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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