Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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