It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
