You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
