just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
