the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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