Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
