Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
