What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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