I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
