Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
