Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
