She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
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