I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Small penises have feelings too.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize