...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
