Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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