Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
