I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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