No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Randomize
