Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
