you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
