Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
