wanna go halves on a baby?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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