Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
