i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
