i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
