...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Woke up backwards on a recliner
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
