at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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