Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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