Plan B is the new Plan A
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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