I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Dick very happy bro
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
