arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
