Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Randomize
