U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
