Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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